This adventure
began year before last. My daughter and I wanted to experience together the
annual American celebration of gross consumerism called Black Friday. She had
never before done Black Friday (or BF as we now affectionately refer to it),
but my daughter had finally come of age and it was time for her introduction to
this important rite of passage. We are, after all, Olympic quality shoppers.
Doubt our status as shopping athletes? One of our favorite things to do as mom
and daughter is to drive many hours from our home to revel in the shopper’s
paradise that is known as Dallas, Texas. Northpark Mall at Christmas is the
closest thing to shopper heaven...if you can find a parking place.
Anyway, I
digress. Our experience the first year, 2011, (call it the nexus year) was a
disappointing bust. We waited until we’d slept late the day after eating all
that Thanksgiving food to rise from delicious slumber and venture out into the
melee. Were we excited? Oh, yes we were! We hit the stores around noon rather
than at midnight. By then, the raging storm of shopping activity had dulled to
a gentle breeze. The stores had even picked up and straightened up their
merchandise. We spent our time wandering from store to store in search of Black
Friday hysteria. In our desperation, we finally hit upon the idea of going to
Toys R Us. The toy store had to be where all the manic shoppers were
congregating. Surely, there was a toy that every child under the age of twelve
must have this year, but even TRU was woefully peaceful. There were no more
shoppers there than on any given Saturday. This wouldn’t do. We were looking
for chaos. We wanted the adrenaline rush of being part of the crowd. We would
do it different in 2012. We would venture out at midnight when all the best sales
started.
So... when
November 2012 rolled around, my daughter and I put on our big girl panties and
hit the stores at midnight. We were so proud of ourselves. We thought we were
brave. We thought we’d experience a new kind of shopper’s high. We thought
surely 2012 would be the year we were one with the shopping universe. To our
delight, the amount of traffic reminded me of Christmas Eve when it falls on a
Saturday. Our pulses raced with excitement. We hit one of those big box chain
stores first, and yes, yes, yes, there were crowds waiting in line to purchase
a television that was on sale. I think our local store ran out shortly after
midnight. Apparently, people will stand in line in the freezing cold hoping to
be one of the lucky ones. We didn’t do that. We didn’t need another television.
Not in 2012 anyway. We darkened the portals of numerous retail establishments
that night. We studied discounts (yeah, I know, the “retail price” is marked
way up so the store can mark it way down on BF), we chose our items, and we
stood in line. And stood in line. And stood in line. We arrived home with our
purchases about three in the morning and collapsed in bed. When we finally woke
up, we wondered what we had purchased the night before that was worth the
aching feet in the morning. More lessons learned. We would do it different in
2013. We wouldn’t stand in line at Kohl’s, no matter what great sales they had
going.
So here we are,
November 2013. My daughter and I have survived another BF experience. We wore
comfortable shoes, we selected our stores carefully, and we shopped. We had one
rule this year. Do not stand in a long line unless we are holding something in
our hands that we absolutely cannot live without. As we meandered from store to
store, we realized there was NOTHING a person could buy that was worth standing
in line that long, so we ditched the cute little snowman trio and left
Kirkland’s empty handed at nearly two in the morning. We had an arts and crafts
day planned mid-morning with my daughter’s boyfriend’s mother. We needed our
rest, so we could craft. We headed home and collapsed into bed. Next year, we
will do it differently. We’ll sleep late and venture out at three in the
afternoon. After all, it’s not about the deep discounts; it’s about the shopping.
But my story
isn’t over... I ended up with the cute little snowman trio anyway. My daughter
and I went home, got some sleep, and went back out at three in the afternoon.
There was only one of the taller snowman left at Kirklands. I checked out the
scene. The lines were much shorter in the light of a day. The snowman trio and I
came home together yesterday.
Ah, my friend,
I’ve learned much from shopping on Black Friday, and when I figure out what
I’ve learned, I’ll...um... Yeah, I’ll get back to you on that.
